Rose and the Doctors guilt
by silversurfer60
Summary: Part of the short stories in the 'What if' series that might have happened if the Doctor and Rose had become romantically involved. After Mickey stays behind on 'Pete s World' Rose realises she has finally driven him away and now nothing can stop her pursuing the Doctor and the Doctor pursuing her without them both feeling guilty. Rated 'M' just in case.


"What if I need you?" a tearful Rose had asked.

"You don`t, it`s just you and him," Mickey had replied.

Those were some of the last words Rose Tyler and Mickey Smith had said to each other as she got back into the Tardis, a few minutes of power remaining for the Doctor to get them back home and into their own universe or be left there forever.

Rose knew the reason why Mickey had chosen to stay, her and the Doctor. Mickey had hit the final nail on the head and hammered it home to her, she had been resentful when Mickey had talked his way on board after the school had been blown up and the Krillitains had been defeated. She had tried to pretend that she wasn`t in love with the Doctor but she was, she knew it and every second they had spent together had proved it, even flirting with him in front of Mickey, not intentionally at first but eventually enough to drive him away.

Even back on Pete`s world, she had shown Mickey less affection than she had the Doctor, the final hug as they`d wished each other good luck had finally proved it, if there had been no-one there she would have kissed him right there and even might have done if she had thought there wasn`t a chance Mickey would turn around and see them. Now he was gone, forever apparently, no way back. She hadn`t intended for him to stay there but she realised he really wasn`t an idiot and that she hadn`t fooled him, she`d been fooling herself into thinking she could control the fine balance between him and the Doctor but the Doctor was tipping the balance in his favour.

Now she had what she wanted but at what cost? She finally had the Doctor to herself and she was not proud of how she had achieved it, driving Mickey away slowly but surely, enough to put him out of the picture and she wasn`t sure now how the Doctor would take it. Was he holding back because he wasn`t sure where he stood? Didn`t want to be caught in the middle? Didn`t want to be the cause of a break-up? But it was her that was caught in the middle and at first she had been undecided which way to turn but after his regeneration, she knew and couldn`t do anything about it because she was afraid the Doctor wouldn`t want her, not when he thought she was still with Mickey, which she wasn`t.

Now it had been resolved for her. Mickey had chosen to remove himself from the picture and all she had to do now is see if the Doctor wanted to pursue their relationship.

ooooo00000ooooo

The Doctor had watched Rose saying goodbye to Mickey, leaving them in favour of preparing the Tardis to leave before the power faded again. He`d told her five minutes but that was to be on the safe side. He had an idea Mickey wasn`t going to be leaving with them but it still came as a shock to actually hear him say it. Rose had said they could go back and visit but they couldn`t, the walls would be sealed as soon as they got away, he couldn`t allow anything to fall through the gap again, not even them. Rose had been upset or was she? He didn`t know if it was the fact Mickey was finally 'getting out' after being tired of being the tin dog or being played for a fool or the fact she could now give him her full attention and would be confronting him sooner or later. Did he want a deeper relationship with her though? Who in their right mind wouldn`t? He was male, warm blooded, not quite human but close enough and very attracted to her, how could he not be attracted to her?

He hadn`t wanted to come between her and Mickey even though it was clear there was no romance left between them but they had remained friends and he`d even agreed eventually to give in and let him travel with them which had resulted in him staying on 'Pete`s World' in the first place. Now they had flown off and Rose would never see him again but seeing Mickey`s face before they had landed there as they were leaving him out of their jokes and sitting together, laughing just moments before they had crash landed, then making sure Rose was ok before he asked Mickey, how could Mickey ever want to return with them? It was only natural he would ask a woman if she was alright before he would ask a man, that`s how humans were. It was the same when Rose had wanted to go see Pete Tyler even though he wasn`t her real father, he`d given in and gone after her. Mickey had been right, there was only one he could chase after and it wasn`t that if he thought Rose could take care of herself, she could but not on another world identical to her own, not knowing just how different it was. If he`d let her go on her own to the Tyler mansion, she might have been killed or converted and he`d never have been able to live with himself and how could he have explained it to Jackie if he ever got back? He would have found a way to tell her no matter what she might have done to him.

No, he`d made the only logical choice and gone after her and Mickey had been right again, there was only one choice and it couldn`t have been Mickey, he was male and didn`t need looking after, Rose did. Now he was feeling guilty that he been the cause of making Mickey`s mind up for him to stay behind because Mickey had seen the way Rose had hugged him as they`d wished each other good luck and he would have kissed her right there if there hadn`t been a group of people there and the fact Mickey may have turned around and seen them.

Now Mickey was gone and he was going to have to face up to Rose sooner or later, admit to her how he felt after putting it off for so long. Now he had no excuses, no reason to hold back. He was standing at the Tardis console waiting for Rose to get back from changing out of the waitress outfit she had looked so cute in. He`d already changed after Rose had said goodbye and he`d got them safely away. He left her to herself thinking she needed time to adjust to the fact Mickey was gone. He waited what seemed like ages and there was no sign of her. He had landed the Tardis just around the back of the Powell Estate and wandered down the corridor to stop outside her room, wondering if he should knock or leave her be. He stood there and in the quiet, heard her crying so he knocked on the door. She opened it, still in her waitress outfit, tears pouring down her cheeks. He stepped into her room and took her into his arms and kissed her cheek. She put her arms around his neck and cried into his shoulder.

ooooo00000ooooo

Rose was in her room, meant to be getting changed, when she was struck by a wave of guilt washing over her. She had put on a tearful face on front of Mickey, for his sake but she knew it had been inevitable and it was a relief. She had all but dumped Mickey to run off with the Doctor and now she was feeling guilty about it and the Doctor was knocking on the door, he must have heard her crying but as she opened the door and he entered her room, she felt his arms around her and she was giving him the wrong idea. She was not crying because Mickey had chosen to stay behind, she was crying because she felt guilty. Guilty of having feelings for the Doctor and not being able to tell him and driving Mickey away in the first place. Now he was kissing her cheek as she buried her head in his shoulder. She felt him holding her close and she lifted her head as he was looking down on her. She didn`t need to say anything, words were not enough. She lifted her head up and their lips were a fraction of an inch apart as their foreheads touched. There was no need for her to pretend any more, no need to hide her feelings and no need to feel guilty as very gently, his lips touched hers for a brief second then pulled away again. Rose reached her head up further to grasp his lips back and they met again, lasting a few seconds longer this time. Rose was now stood on her tip-toes, her arms further around him, trying to pull herself up as he put his arms around her waist and lifted her up, their lips now fully locked.

ooooo00000ooooo

He found himself kissing her lips for just a second, he liked the feeling, then she was reaching up to get another, lasting much longer this time, when suddenly he let her go, placing her gently on her feet then just as suddenly, he picked her up in his arms and walked over to the bed, laying her across the bedspread. He kneeled down over her as he was pulled down onto her into another kiss as he took his jacket off and put she put her arms around his waist and he felt his shirt being tugged out of the top of his trousers. He undid the buttons of her dress and lifted it over her head, then pulled down her black tights as she kicked off her shoes, leaving her in her lacy underwear. He bent over her and kissed the uncovered parts of her body, slowly reaching behind her back and unfastening her bra, pulling it away, bending over her again to kiss her newly uncovered breasts.

ooooo00000ooooo

After he had undressed her and kissed her all over until she was just in her lacy knickers, she drew him closer to her, then she was pulling off his tie and began to unbutton his shirt and unfastening the cuffs, pulling the shirt over his shoulders revealing his hairy chest. She tugged at the button of his trousers and unfastened the zip, pulling them down as he helped her until he was just in his shorts. Sitting them both up, she turned him until he was underneath her and she bent over him and kissed him across his chest as she felt his hands on her hips, reaching for her knickers as her arms were around his neck, feeling down his back.

ooooo00000ooooo

As they continued exploring each other, kissing and touching, Rose Tyler and the Doctor finally had what they both wanted and needed so badly, each other`s full attention and they were going to enjoy every last second of it without any guilt. 


End file.
